Saturday, August 10, 2013

I was a victim of domestic violence in my marriage - Nollywood Actress Chika Ike opens up

Nollywood Actress Chike Ike in an open letter to her fans, opens up about her being a victim of domestic violence in her marriage, how she was physically abused by the man she called her husband for five years. Read below;

The past three years has been a very emotional period for me. I focused my energy on work and to build back my self esteem. its been really hard for me to come out straight and talk about this because sometimes I pinch myself to wake up and not believe that I was a victim of domestic violence. I've been through a lot in my life, faced a lot of challenges but this is one topic I've tried so hard to avoid and have been waiting for the right time but I have come to a resolve that there's really no right time because every second of the day,lives are being lost due to domestic violence. I was a victim of domestic violence in my marriage and that was the singular reason I left my marriage, aside other reasons.

Growing up as a girl. I was always known as the sweetest kid on the block, before I got married, I have been through
some relationships and for once
no man had ever laid a finger on
me. The first time it happened in
my marriage I didn't understand
it because I am not the type of
woman a man beats but I guess
there are no types. It just
happens and no woman
deserves it. As a young girl I
thought it was love or his way
of expressing his emotions,after
every beating he pleads , cries
and says it won't happen again,
once again I thought it was love
and made excuses for him. Over
the years when it kept
happening consistently I started
looking for other definitions for
it. I started loosing my self
pride,self esteem , self worth,
and most painfully i lost a
pregnancy (Miscarriage) I almost
lost my life in the process then I
realised how serious and
abnormal it really was.

I have heard and read a lot of
accusations from ignorant
people who don't know my
story,I guess that's why they are
ignorant. I was 20yrs old and
very naïve to the world when I
got married ." They said I
married for money" LOL. I was
married to a corporate guy,who
had a 9_5 job in a bank, Lives in
a rented 2 bedroom apartment
at Egbe.. So do the maths! . I
married for love. I did a
traditional wedding. A white
wedding and a court wedding.
So that's how much I wanted to
be married forever. For five
years I hoped, prayed & wished
that one day it will all change.
But the last straw that broke the
carmels back was during a
heated argument he threw a
glass jug to my face and I
dogged it and it shattered on d
wall. I saw death flash before
me and I made a decision to
save my life. I left my marriage.

Am not saying this to draw pity from anyone because we are entitled to our opinions and believes. I am not also saying this to discourage people from falling in love because its a beautiful feeling and I still believe in it. I am saying this to educate, share and talk about my experience as a victim of domestic violence because it is real.

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